Forever Blue, also known as Endless Ocean, is a non-gamers dream. You do next to nothing and just kind of fall into a drug induced haze brought on by the new age music. But at least you can touch all kinds of underwater creatures, right? Seriously have you ever petted a freaking fish? Why am I scuba diving to pet tons of random fish like I would pet my dog? Better yet why can I poke them, do I really want to be pissing off sharks? How much do scuba lessons cost, can I return this and just go do that? Blah, well at least it looks pretty.

Is that Enya's sister?
Once you’re actually in the game you’ll initially be on the deck of your ship. You can talk to your shipmates, mess around with your pets, or just head into the cabin to get your next assignment. Almost all the assignments revolve around you floating around underwater to discover some fish or thing you haven’t seen before. As you discover more and report back to your e-mail heavy boss you’ll open up more areas to which you can take your boat to as well as online play.

When you’re underwater the controls are extremely simple. You just point the Wiimote around and use the B button to kick. Point your cursor at the corners of the screen to rotate and point it at fish to pet or poke them. When you do pet, prod, or poke a fish this weird ass cartoon hand appears and the fish you’re touching does a little wiggle. It’s all strangely disturbing and nice at the same time. If you get the perv out of your head and just take it as a nice swim in the sea, the “gameplay” can be quite relaxing and oddly entertaining.

When you’re not molesting the underwater creatures you can train pets like a dolphin which you’ve unlocked or find some big ass whale to grab onto and ride. That or enter photo mode where you… take photos. Honestly after a couple hours floating around and listening to the insanely female soundtrack I kind of wanted to shoot myself in the face.